OFF Stuff For Fun Reads: This JUST IN !!!

@scotty yelling

ZOMBIES TAKING OVER CHRISTMAS

I AM LIVE ON THE Scene :)

@scotty yelling

THIS JUST IN FROM SANTA

@scotty yelling

He doesn't care if you are naughty or nice,
He doesn't care what you want for Christmas,
He only wants to know how you taste!
Forget the cookies and milk,
You'd better peek this Christmas 'cause
Zombie Santa is checking his list
And your name might be on it!

THIS IS TERRIBLE FOLKS

@scotty yelling

There has been a small outbreak of “zombism” in a small town near the border of San Diego in North-Eastern El Cajon.

The culprit was discovered to be mosquitoes native to that region carrying a new strain of Malaria which thus far has a 100 percent mortality rating killing victims in fewer than 2 days.

@scotty yelling

After death, this virus is able to restart the heart of it’s victim for up to two hours after the initial demise of the person where the individual behaves in extremely violent ways from what is believe to be a combination of brain damage and a chemical released into blood during “resurrection.” General ArySerey had this to say, "We have obtained samples of this new virus and plan to learn how it starts the heart and other major organs of the deceased. We intend to use this to increase the quality of life for all. We Have Also Found a Zombie we believe to be the one carrying out the plan, he is a sinister little shit, but known to have a big heart, we have obtained a photo"

@scotty yelling

" WE also believe he has other zombies working for him"

@scotty yelling

"We Have No Name on His accomplice"

" Hold Tight Please , WE HAVE SOME MORE BREAKING NEWS"

"It Seems They Have sent out some kind of Ransom note"

@scotty yelling

"YES YES..... and It Reads As Follows"
No Wait this is a note From the said "Sinister little Shit"

'Twas the week before Christmas and all through the town,
Not a zombie was stirring; they'd all been gunned down.
The corpses were burned in the chimney with care;
The stench of their rot was soon filling the air.
The living were nestled all snug in their beds,
Hoping their brains were still safe in their heads.
And Ma with her Uzi and me with my gun,
Stood watch o'er the door, ready to run.
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my seat to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash;
Tore down the nailed boards and threw up the sash.
The moon on the breast of the blood spattered snow
Gave the lustre of mid-day to the terrors below.
When, what to my horrified eyes should appear,
But a miniature hearse and eight undead reindeer.
I had to move fast, I had to shoot quick;
Or else I'd fall victim to brain-hungry St. Nick.
More rapid than eagles, more zombies came;
Some of them neighbors, I knew them by name.
"There's Harvey and William; there's Barbara and Billy;
That's Carol and Sarah, well don't they look silly!"
They lurched toward the porch, they clawed at the wall;
Blast away, blast away! I shot at them all.
Still on toward the house, the zombies kept coming;
If Santa got in, we'd all soon be running.
Then like a nightmare, I heard on the roof
Scratching and moaning -- It's not zombie-proof!
As I drew in my head and was turning around,
Down the chimney a zombie came with a bound.
He was all dressed in rags, from his head to his foot
And his clothes were all covered in brains, blood and soot.
Another soon followed right on his back,
They shuffled on in, prepared to attack.
Their eyes were all milky, their cheeks sunken in;
Their lips were drawn back in a sardonic grin.
The hair on their heads was as stiff as dead straw;
Their fingers curled up into flesh-tearing claws.
The stump of an arm was clenched in one's teeth,
And the face of the other resembled ground beef.
They were greenish and pale, all rotten and smelly;
I shot one in the head; his brains turned to jelly.
Another soon followed, dressed like an elf.
I laughed when I saw it, in spite of myself.
It looked at me and twisted its head,
Filling my gut with a feeling of dread.
It spoke not a word, but went straight to its work,
Shambling and shuffling, all gnashing and jerks.
I pulled my trigger - Right in the nose!
He wanted to eat me, or worse, I suppose.
Ma sprang to my side, shot one and then whistled.
"Guess that'll keep him from chewing our gristle."
Once the zombies were dead, I turned off the light.
A Zombie Christmas to all, and to all a good night!

:) HAVE A GREAT CHRISTMAS EVE , HOPE YOU ENJOYED MY LITTLE ZOMBIE

FUN :)

LOVE YOU ALL and Miss You